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The boy in blue.

It started there, in 1999, when I finished painting a daffodil and kept looking at it with an orgasmic feeling. 

It started there, in 1999, when I danced as if the birthday party was mine and I couldn't stop being a character in the center, in front of the camcorder. 

It started there, in 2001 when the literature teacher gave me 17 out of 20 because my short story was too good to be written by a child. 

It started there, in 1997, when I escaped the second week of the first grade to go on an "adventure" among a patch of trees on the way home. 

It started there when I was 7 and fell in love with her first and kept thinking of her until I met her for the second time at 15. 

It started there, in 2003, when I plucked my eyebrows at 13 like a "girl" and became a vegetarian, and preferred watching the sunset in dial-up internet time, in a religious country under dictatorship. 

It paused, whenever I had to present, exhibit or explain it to anyone.

The thing, that thing was too precious, too private to be given a human degree, praise, or recognition.

That thing, that inevitable thing was too real to be labeled.

I accepted the lie and the label, when they called me an artist, it was more practical. Like small talk that at best acknowledges the presence of another person, and that's maybe its external function; a sign post. 

That thing, that urge, to experience an experience, translate and transform an experience started then, and perhaps it continues regardless. That thing, that is independent of an external observer, or audience. 

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Dreams of an Afterthought

installation, performance, poetry film

at Matthäikirchhof in Leipzig (former Stasi buildings), 2021

project link

listen to the poem used in the film:

Dreams of an AfterthoughtMilad Rezaei
00:00 / 02:39
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Last Touch

a dance film, a public performance investigating the notion of human connection. It follows a visual narrative of two queer individuals in public, and their attempt to navigate in the public space despite their disconnection to one another and the environment.

2016, Virginia USA

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Across the Mind

a dance film, an inquiry into body movement and its constrained limits in public spaces. It is a reflection on the human body and its relation to public and private spheres. the performance of being embodied. 

2016, Virginia USA

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a self-portrait short film

made in 3 years, in 3 countries


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